The Family In The Attic:

My first "family In The Attic" entry is a family portrait. I've changed the names and the species to Vulcan. From left to right: Yeoman, first class, TI'Chan, next to her is First Officier Suran, and to his right the very sexy Nurse T'Pana.

The Family In The Attic:























Mitzi Said...Poor old Doris Stagg, pictured left, like any other victim of domestic violence will tell you, living with the threat of violence is the worst feeling ever. She feared the slam of the door as he got in from the pub at night, the vein twitching on his forehead, as he demanded a blowjob, she would have to take out her false teeth first so as not to nip his bell-end again. The last time she nipped it Bruce had kicked her in the windpipe which caused it to collapse, she had to have an emergency tracheotomy tube fitted, but because he wouldn’t let her go to the hospital she was forced to perform the operation herself using a blunt knife and a tube of macaroni. Why didn’t she leave him I hear you ask? Utter fear, that’s why. Bruce kept her under lock and key and he kept a knife under the mattress just in case she stepped out of line. Bruce was a good artist and he liked to express himself by drawing pictures of dead people, with their guts spilling out. Because he wasn’t working he found it difficult to pay the bills that were mounting up, so Bruce had taken out a loan with the local tally lady Mavis Davis pictured on the right. Mavis was a kind woman, happily married to Edward with four children and 18 grandchildren she was very much liked by all. “I’m going to kill Mavis and bury her body under the floorboards” raged Bruce, one evening, he was so outraged he was foaming at the mouth and his face purple with rage, pacing around the living room like a caged animal, waiting for Mavis to knock at the door, she arrived promptly at 6pm. Doris in a panic rushed into the kitchen and shut the door behind her and fainted. When Doris came round they was something different about Bruce, he seemed twitchy, excited even. “I’ve done it,” he hissed, done what? Doris gasped. I’ve killed Mavis. She put up a fight, but it was easy I strangled her, blood poured out of her nose, ears, eyes and mouth I’ve buried her under the floor boards up in the attic along with some personal belongings on hers, he went upstairs and after five minutes came back down clutching Mavis's handbag. "Look!” he pulled out Mavis’s payment record book along with $500. Then he began to laugh like a maniac. His fingers pinched Doris’s neck tighter and tighter “There’s plenty of room under the floorboards he whispered, “If you tell anyone what I’ve done, I’ll kill you and your body will rot besides Mavis’s. Defeated and weak as a kitten, Doris limped around the house like a zombie, and two months later she had a nervous breakdown. “What’s the point of living?” she muttered, swallowing a handful of tablets. GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD

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  1. Poor old Doris Stagg, pictured left, like any other victim of domestic violence will tell you, living with the threat of violence is the worst feeling ever. She feared the slam of the door as he got in from the pub at night, the vein twitching on his forehead, as he demanded a blowjob, she would have to take out her false teeth first so as not to nip his bell-end again. The last time she nipped it Bruce had kicked her in the windpipe which caused it to collapse, she had to have an emergency tracheotomy tube fitted, but because he wouldn’t let her go to the hospital she was forced to perform the operation herself using a blunt knife and a tube of macaroni. Why didn’t she leave him I hear you ask? Utter fear, that’s why. Bruce kept her under lock and key and he kept a knife under the mattress just in case she stepped out of line. Bruce was a good artist and he liked to express himself by drawing pictures of dead people, with their guts spilling out. Because he wasn’t working he found it difficult to pay the bills that were mounting up, so Bruce had taken out a loan with the local tally lady Mavis Davis pictured on the right. Mavis was a kind woman, happily married to Edward with four children and 18 grandchildren she was very much liked by all. “I’m going to kill Mavis and bury her body under the floorboards” raged Bruce, one evening, he was so outraged he was foaming at the mouth and his face purple with rage, pacing around the living room like a caged animal, waiting for Mavis to knock at the door, she arrived promptly at 6pm. Doris in a panic rushed into the kitchen and shut the door behind her and fainted. When Doris came round they was something different about Bruce, he seemed twitchy, excited even. “I’ve done it,” he hissed, done what? Doris gasped. I’ve killed Mavis. She put up a fight, but it was easy I strangled her, blood poured out of her nose, ears, eyes and mouth I’ve buried her under the floor boards up in the attic along with some personal belongings on hers, he went upstairs and after five minutes came back down clutching Mavis's handbag. "Look!” he pulled out Mavis’s payment record book along with $500. Then he began to laugh like a maniac. His fingers pinched Doris’s neck tighter and tighter “There’s plenty of room under the floorboards he whispered, “If you tell anyone what I’ve done, I’ll kill you and your body will rot besides Mavis’s. Defeated and weak as a kitten, Doris limped around the house like a zombie, and two months later she had a nervous breakdown. “What’s the point of living?” she muttered, swallowing a handful of tablets. GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD

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