AYE:

So I travel for work. While driving along and boredom kicks in the mind thinks up all sorts of terrible things, like, "How many dead deer have you seen thus far? That must have been the sixteenth one…but was it a doe or a buck? There is a difference…I don't want to mess up the count." Or I shouldn't be blogging while driving. Or that gas was $2.95 but it's $3.05 up ahead and it was $2.55 in Dothan. Then of course you search for ragbag hair salons out in the middle of nowhere. You occasionally notice weird signs like the one promising discreet DNA testing tacked up on a telephone pole twenty miles from the nearest house or hospital. There must be a need.

My all time favorite delirium driving game is making up new lyrics for songs that obviously need them. Whitney is a prime target as well as Ke$ha and Pink. But songs with 'eyes' in the title…now that really gets me going. I like to change it from the plural, 'eyes' to, 'eye'.

Private Eye…it's watching you it see's your every move…
And I only have eye for you…
For your eye only…
Blue eye…crying in the rain…
Doctor my eye…
Your an eye without a face…an eye without a face…
Hungry eye…
Lying eye…
Green eye lady…ocean lady…

I think you all know where this is going? The ultimate 'eye' song is…Don't it make my brown eye, don't it make my brown eye, don't it make my brown eye…blue!