Today:

Many notes of interest as of late, today a seemingly mature educated adult white women burst through the doors cautioned her friend that yes indeed she saw the, “Man on the bench I’ll shoot the shit with’em while you get the car” as her friend ambled off upon her orders.

Strange thing was, she never used a verb or a linking verb or any thing remotely similar. “We from Alabama!” and “You right!” I suppose you could consider, “Shoot the shit” a verb but really now. I tried to communicate the condition of the fair beau weather we have been so fortunate to receive lately, “You right, you right...then again it hot too...ooh my ankles...shoppin’...hurt.” I tried to leave on a dignified moment, “Yes Ma’am it was nice talking with you today...”

Bye Bye Alabama lady.

A gorgeous associate of Sicilian decent with a stripper body and real tits asking, “How do you play the porn name game?" I of course chirp up and say, "Well you take the name of your first pet and the name of the first street or the one that you grew up on, in my case my porn name is ‘Sport Bristol' a fitting name for any porn moniker. So what was the name of your first pet?”

Gorgeous associate: “Creamy”

Me: “Ooh that’s a good start.”

Gorgeous associate: “I don’t know the street though...I’ll call my Dad.”

Several minutes later, a phone call the whole world could hear and then the best porn name in the entire world unfurled at my feet,

Gorgeous associate: “What was the street I grew up on ...you know the first street we lived at? What’s that ? Beaver Street? Okay bye...That’s not good it’s like an animal...Creamy Beaver...it doesn’t even make any sense...Creamy Beaver!"

Me: “Oh Honey it makes all the sense in the world.”