Scooter People:

I think everyone knows how I feel about scooter people.


Well, it’s one thing if you have a need and have been rewarded with an invention that increases your mobility. For heavens sake get out there and scoot and mingle because we haven’t seen you in a while. Back in my day people like that just stayed at home where they belonged.

It’s entirely a different thing if you are a lazy cow that never exercised and blew out your knees. It’s unsightly not to mention dangerous to scoot around on public sidewalks adjoining busy streets wearing a pink unwashed stained spaghetti strapped halter top, bleached un-toned hair the color of a baby chicken, faded ill-fitting studded capri jeans, Buddha belly ring, and chipped toenail polish. Careening into a ditch then implying that I HAVE to help you out of your predicament.

I mean’s embarrassing.

I saw this little surveillance clip of a scooter moron who suffered a bout of ‘scooter rage’. I’m sure the tape was used in a trial to exonerate the buildings owners whom I feel sure the scooter moron was trying to sue over a ‘faulty door’ premise.

The lady in the cab before him waited patiently for other riders to board and finally pushed her button and whisked away to her destination. However I suspect she feels the same way I do about these people that run over your toes and saw him coming and did what she was supposed to do. Run for her life.

Enjoy your moment of Scooter Zen.


  1. I expect I'll be ticketed for scooter rage should I ever have the need for a mobility aid.

    I've been known to exhibit shopping cart rage during PMS.

  2. I have catatonic states sometimes. I guess I would block traffic in my scooter?

  3. I heard the man died, which made it even more hilarious.

    I wouldn't say no to a motorised chaise longue.

  4. Mj: I've been known to have 'burger rage' at the drive thru.

    XL: I have the number for Mobility Depot...just think you'll be careening off the Grand Canyon in days from now.

    Mitzi: I want a motorized mobility bed!

    Jill: I know, I know...

  5. "the color of a baby chicken"?

    Ok, that is now officially in my vocabulary.
    thank you.

  6. What the hell is going on in the video!! Crazy!!

  7. Oh for fuck's sake! He drove himself into the elevator pit?! Damn, girlfriend got scooter rage!

  8. Last night I went back to my hometown for a public event (for a non-profit I support) that was held in an assisted retirement facility (its great PR for the facility) and I was appalled at the number of residents that had these "mobility devices" and they are zooming through the event, picking and choosing finger foods right off the buffet like they were invited!

    I turned to my husband and poited out that if I ran a place like that, Lawrence Welk would be on the television starting at 5:00PM everyday, and no scootering after sundown.