These Christmas Decorations are Shocking:


Many years ago I was asked to make a little movie to entertain some friends at a Christmas party. I agreed but was at a loss as to what the subject matter should be. Then I remembered taking little trips at night with my grandmother and her sisters to marvel at the electric lights all over town. We would drive around and stop and get out while aunt Bess snapped a few pictures for her scrap book.

Anyway the owner of the local homo bar was to be at this party. He was flamboyant with one of those (rare these days) flamboyant homo decorated homes. Each Christmas he would pull out all the stops and over decorate the yard with a million lights and vignettes then on Christmas Eve he would dress as Santa and climb the roof and give presents to the lil’chilren. Mostly it was for publicity.

The crowd attending this party would sort of snicker behind his back about all the fuss he made each year, “I would hate to get his power bill...” and “She’s such a show off...always outdoing everyone” and my favorite, “If he adds one more strand of lights the whole city will be plunged into a blackout.”

So one night during the holiday break I grabbed my friend Roy (the narrator of the Lights Lights Lights Lighting Emporium commercial) and James and we set out to film a Christmas light tour like my great aunts would have done but this time with shocking results. Then we came home and narrated it into a little travelogue. Incidentally the last house we go to is the very one that belonged to the homo bar owner.

He enjoyed it.

So should you,

Happy Holidays


11 comments:

  1. My my my this is SO glamorous!

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  2. It's like having every one of my dead aunts come back all at once. Eeks.

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  3. It reminds me of a classic John Waters film before he became mainstream and boring.

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  4. The empress and i still do this with the royal nieces... Every Christmas. I think it's more for the Wmpress to ooh and Ahh at as the nieces are usually giving commentary on which ones are the same as the previous year... and endup arguing with the Empress...
    I just love it...

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  5. uh, i know i'm supposed to write something snarky, but i'm afraid to start.

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  6. This is how all those UFO legends out there got started, isn't it?

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  7. You just can't let Aunt Arnez out of the car.

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  8. Ok, this is the best. EVER!!!! y'all.

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  9. Ah'm gonna bring mama out here next week...
    More films from the attic, please!

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  10. What Mitzi said. A little bit scary in that one doesn't know what to expect but it could really be ANYthing.

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