What Not To Wear:
I was going through my racks of clothes in my double closet and suddenly became a petulant little girl throwing a tantrum. I have nothing to wear! I hate my clothes! I really wanted a certain item but was just not able to locate it. So I threw a fit.
This time of economic hardship just makes me want to go shopping for things I don’t need and buy things I won’t wear. Then I got a really good idea. What if I went to Goodwill and bought about a hundred dollars worth of rags and took pictures of me wearing these awful ensembles then sent the pictures to What Not To Wear.
Ta Da. Problem solved. Clinton and Stacey would feel so sorry for me that they would burn my Goodwill duds and give me a brand new five thousand dollar wardrobe. Plus I would get to keep my actual wardrobe. Plus I would totally get to sleep with Clinton. Plus Plus Plus.